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It seems that with the cult following that Ron Paul has, he would have at least pulled in a state or two. Well here are my theories as to why Ron Paul didn’t sweep the Republican primaries.

Everybody likes to point at Fox News for not covering Ron Paul enough, they say that the silenced him and they gave him as little coverage as possible. I say that they are all trolls. If they just completely ignored Fox News and and drudged on despite them, everything would be grand. Hey I have an idea, lets give up and start whining since Fox News isn’t giving fair coverage! Maybe we should digg an article or two since that will make a huge difference.

Here are some real reasons that Ron Paul didn’t win in the primaries.

Nobody wants the Iraq war to end.

Ron Paul is the only candidate that supports an immediate withdrawal from Iraq, this leads me to the conclusion that all the protests and all the complaining that nearly every single American has done was completely voided by their vote to put someone in office who won’t get us out. Sure, Clinton and Obama plan a “graduated” exit, but how likely is that? Bush has been trying to claim victory since what, 2004? No, Americans are hypocrites. Simultaneously they demand peace and vote for candidates that will continue to keep us in Iraq.

No Gimmicks

Unlike other presidential candidates, Ron Paul doesn’t have any gimmicks. Cinton pulls on the fact that she is a woman, McCain would become the oldest president if elected, and even though it shouldn’t matter it seems that everybody likes to emphasize that Obama is “African American” (political correctness!). Even Mitt Romney has a card up his sleeve: he is a mormon (I didn’t say it was an ace…) and people are fussing over that, but as they say: any press is good press.

I’ve gleaned some data from CBS News and put it in a pretty little pie chart for you. It shows the percentage of women that voted for Clinton on Super Tuesday. For weeks and weeks analysts said that Clinton would take the women’s vote and Barack would take the black peoples vote. Its comforting to know that we vote based on people who share the same body parts as us, not on the person who would do the best job.

The Rest of the World Wants Him

First, visit Who Would the World Elect?. It seems the rest of the world wants Ron Paul as the president of the United States. But do Americans listen to advice? NO! That is what makes us American. In fact, just to spite those cocky foreigners, we will do just the opposite and put our votes towards John McCain, who has the second least amount of votes worldwide, and yet is leading the Republican nomination.

No wonder not too many nations are fond of us, we “give” advice (in the form of forcing it down their throats) but ignore advice given to us. I love Americans…

Oversupply of Milk, Demand is in Cheese

This is my milk and cheese theory. Milk is the fresh straight-from-the-cow deliciousness that tends to be overlooked. Cheese is the old moldy stuff that people still like to eat. So the main idea here is that one candidate is the milk, and the rest are cheese. Sure, most of the candidates have some use, and some good ideas, but most of them are recycled year after year. Now the one candidate who is milk, Ron Paul, has some fresh ideas: return back to the way our country was meant to be. Return power back to the states, follow the Constitution like we were meant to. Okay, so it isn’t a new idea, Constitutional-ism has been around since the Constitution was written, but we haven’t heard it in so long that it sounds new and, in my eyes as well as many others over the internet, looks fresh.

Well maybe it is just at my college, but I notice that people don’t drink a lot of milk around here. On the other hand, the cafeteria has trouble keeping cheese stocked for making sandwiches, burritos, pizzas, cheeseburgers, and all the rest. Simple point: people like cheese, they like to hang on to what has been around for a while.

Well on Rashy.org I fully support milk, it is the single greatest substance on Earth, whether white, chocolate, strawberry, or 2%, fresh milk is amazing. Fresh ideas are amazing.