So as you may have noticed (well I suppose blind people use the internet as well) I finally got a new theme for this place that I like. I didn’t design it myself (I tried, but I just don’t have the time right now), but while I was looking around at different designs I came across a web design company that claims its had its design “pirated” multiple times by different people. So I wondered, do web designers have a sense of humor? (more…)
As most of the internet knows, Anonymous recently decided that they have had enough of the Cult of Scientology. The reasons are many for the recent attacks, and the legality of some of their tactics are questionable, but the means bring about at least one end for everybody: laughs. Well, except for the Church of Scientology. Surprisingly, there hasn’t been that much of a reaction from them. No matter though, let the lulz continue.
A little bit ago the RIAA’s lawyers proposed a model for economics in the United States. Keep in mind that these are lawyers proposing the model, and not economists. So naturally, everything is slanted. Give me a lawyer who hasn’t sold out his soul and ethics and I’ll show you a redneck that doesn’t drink beer. Their model was pretty straight forward and it made sense… if you are a drunk or a music industry big shot. We’d better put on the beer goggles to make sense out of it.
(more…)
It seems that zombies are nothing but a fantasy. Another Halloween has come and gone with no undead walking the streets, eating people’s brains out. This is too bad, because I have always wanted to get into a fight with a zombie, not necessarily for the risk of getting turned into one myself (although that would be pretty cool) but just to have a person-like thing to take all my anger out on. I’ve always wanted to chop somebody’s head off and shove it down what remains of their neck into their stomach. Anyways, I recently realized that zombification is less likely to occur from some virus (like in Resident Evil) or genetic mutation (Far Cry) or through chemicals (as on Haiti). In fact, it is already happening, and I am a victim.
You think that if you were a website designer, or at least a graphic designer, that you would have an attractive and usable web design. Apparently not. How do they stay in business? How do they not repulse their visitors and disgust their clients? There should be some sort of test, a passing board. Lawyers have to pass the bar exam, doctors need a license to practice, engineers have a certification they must pass, why don’t professional web designers?
Is it possible to love Microsoft? Everybody sure loves bashing on them, complaining about how terrible Windows is, how they are never innovative, how their monopoly allows them to walk all over their customers, how Microsoft is becoming Big Brother, and the list goes on and on and on. Wait, are those complaints coming from the same people who rave about how good the Halo series is, or about how revolutionary the XBox 360 is? Fortunately I don’t like either, so I feel that am perfectly okay to criticize the company, aside from my dependence on their operating system. Despite my best efforts, I still find a few things to love about this hegemon.
It is undeniable that Hollywood is going down the drain. People have been saying it for years, but this summer is the worst of them all for Hollywood. I’m not saying this because Paris Hilton got thrown into jail (when was the last time she starred in a movie anyway?) I’m not talking about all he third sequels that are coming out (Ocean’s Thirteen wasn’t that bad of a movie). I am talking about a movie titled Becoming Jane. The movie is about Jane Austen. For those who don’t know: the author of Pride and Prejudice, as well as a bunch of other boring books. (more…)
[begin sarcasm]
I have here a compiled here what is perhaps the greatest list of the greatest television shows of all time. There is no better acting, directing, backdrops, and all that other stuff than what is found in these shows. Most of them flopped because people just couldn’t comprehend the beauty in them. (more…)
Just give me the results!
So is anybody else fed up with those sites who throw links to their sponsors all over the place? Or how about those sites that bring you to a special page that says “Get these great deals!” right in the middle of your browsing? I don’t want to sign up for your spam lists! I don’t want to commit my soul to a credit card company! I just want to keep browsing.
The Hotmail Rant
Several sites feature this annoying method of advertising their sponsors. Of them, I find that Hotmail is the most annoying. Does Microsoft not have enough money as is? They need to seriously cut this out of their system. Since I am being so vague, I will go ahead and point right at the offending content.
One of the first things they ask you to do when you sign up for a Hotmail account is choose your package. They want you to pay for certain features that should come with all e-mail accounts! Lets take a look at the list of features that the basic free list is lacking.
- Outlook Express (or other e-mail client) access. Comes free with Gmail, Yahoo Mail, and AOL Mail.
- No expiration. Yes, Hotmail will delete your account if you don’t access it often. Gmail doesn’t do this.
- More than 1GB of storage. Microsoft is really getting their ass kicked by Gmail in this race.
- Conversation grouping. Actually, I think Gmail is the only one that offers this, but everyone should have it.
So you get it, Microsoft can’t provide basic features. The next loop you have to jump through is their stupid parental controls. I accidentally set my age to under 18. Hell followed. Even closing my browser and clearing my cache/cookies/sessions and everything couldn’t save me from the screen. I need parental permission. I am an adult, but I need permission from my parents in order to use Hotmail.
Yes, they want you to give them your credit card number. Maybe it is just me, but I don’t trust Microsoft with my credit card number. When they have so many paid services (such as those above) and such a long and extensive terms of use, how do I know that those greedy pigs didn’t slip something in about requiring purchase of a service whenever you hand over your credit card number? They have done other criminal acts before, such as creating Windows.
Finally, on to the biggest and worst part about signing up for Hotmail. The services that you can get (and probably would be charged for…)
Talk about long, eh? Somethings were meant to be, this isn’t one of them. It is unnatural to have this many subscriptions! Your junk mail box would be like trying to use a bucket to try and stop the floodwaters.
I love Microsoft as much as McDonald’s.
Chain Letters
I don’t know who first thought of the chain letter, but they are one of those people who are better off not born, like Hitler and Elmo. Daily I wake up and check my e-mail to see whats new. 60 messages! Amazing, I am popular. There has to be at least one from that cute girl I met yesterday, right? Nope. Instead there are 60 e-mails informing me that I must pass on the e-mail to 10 friends, or forever suffer from a bad sexual life. Just great, things were starting to get good between me and this girl and then I get cursed by a handful of bytes stored on a far away server.
Of course, chain letters can be great fun if you can take a step back and read them impersonally, and with the attitude that nothing bad will happen to you. Then picture this: some teenage girl will read the same chain letter, then frantically pass it on to all of her friends, finding that she is an incredible 1 friend short of the required amount. “Oh no! Does sending it to yourself count? Nope!?!” Then you can sit back and enjoy the crying because she will have a bad sex life for the next 7 years. Actually, I think guys would be more disappointed with having a bad sex life. Telling the girls that they will have bad fashion sense for the rest of their life. That would be scary for them.
There is actually a second type of chain letter, the ones that are positive and all happy and deserve to die not once, but three or four times. Those are the ones that promise you will meet the love of your life by next Friday if you don’t break the chain letter, and usually contain a paragraph that is supposed to reassure you by saying something like “OMG THIS RELLY WORKS!!11! I TRIED IT ADN I MET HIM/HER JSUT LICK IT SAYS!!1!!” I think such reassurances are there to burn your brain out so you can’t think and accidentally send on the chain letter.
Of course, some chain letters combine both the positive and the negative. Beware, its a trap! This is one of the lighter chain letters, where the punishment isn’t so bad:
Subject: I’m havin’ a baby
Body: IT’S PRETTY FUNNY THAT YOU OPENED this because in the next
seven days you will:* have someone fall in love with you
* find money you’ve been missing
* your luck will change for the better in all areas… love, happiness, job, money,BUT…first you will have to repost this with 1 of these titles:
“I’m a lesbian”
“I GOT ARRESTED AGAIN”
”Baby I want you back, im sorry ”
“Just to settle all the rumors… yes i did”
“I’m getting married!”
“I got the job!.. I’m moving to Ireland!”
“”
“I guess it was never meant to be”
“I got the scholarship!…I’m going to LSU”
“I’m moving : (
“I’m havin a baby”
BEWARE IF U DONT REPOST THIS U WILLL HAVE BAD
LUCK FOR 2 years
Lets analyze! Poor spelling? Check. Bad grammar? Check. Threat? Check. Entirely stupid reason to re-send the chain letter? Check. As a bonus, I only got pinned with 2 years of bad luck. Does bad luck stack? If so I should die of bad luck sometime soon.
This is a class-A stupid chain letter. Now we move on with life.
Wait! What if we could design the perfect chain letter that absolutely nobody would dare break? What would it consist of? Definitely everything in the check list above, and a touch of my magic hand. In fact, I think I will go ahead and right one now, feel free to distribute it!
Subject: Eating Naked Babies
Body: HAHAHA! You sick little pervert… you got a letter titled “Eating Naked Babies” and you opened it? How twisted are you?But that doesn’t matter, this is the lamest chain letter in the world. It works different from most, you get to select what bad stuff will happen to you! Choose two, or all will ail you.
1) A swarm of toasters will destroy your house.
2) You will find yourself naked in times square… eating a baby!
3) The (girl/guy) you love… will date your twin (brother/sister) and get all smoochy with him in front of you.
4) You will get older faster (i.e. gray hairs will start popping out next week).
5) You will be forced to live with your parents for the rest of your life.
6) Your swimming trunks will fall while you are swimming with your grandparents.Well now that you have picked your poison, its time to get your reward. Choose one:
1) President Bush somehow gets re-elected for a third term.
2) Travel with Fred Phelps and company; get to see the nation in style!*
3) A free trip to Iraq.***Attendance of Westboro Baptist Church mandatory. No refunds.
**Enlistment in the U.S. Army required. See website for details.Now, the requirements! You must pass this on to 367 friends within the next 20 seconds or the bad stuff you chose will happen to you. Hurry! (*hint* MySpace bulletins might help you).
Loves and kisses from the safety of my house,
Rashy
http://rashy.org
There you have it, an awesome chain letter! Bad spelling and grammar omitted for clarity reasons, please add as necessary. Oh, and if you don’t pass on that chain letter after reading this article, then all that bad stuff will happen to you. Not just one or two, but all of them. Now, to actually get on with life.